Recently, a reader asked me some questions about what guys really think about sex, and I felt compelled to ask around for some answers for her. Today, I'll let you know what I found out about Part 1 of her questions. How okay are one night stands in today's world? I feel like they are just as common as anything, but are they? And if they are, how do guys feel about girls who have them? Is that something you disclose in a relationship or just let it go?
Along with that question I also really want to know how many sexual partners is acceptable for a girl to have in a guy's opinion. Now, I know you want the opinions of men, since they are the people you're sleeping with. However, I write this blog so I'm putting my two cents in first: Guys are entitled to their opinions, and I can see why you're curious to know what those opinions are.
I'm curious too. But I think a one night stand or casual sex is exactly as acceptable as you are comfortable with. That means if you're having fun and being safe, go for it. If it doesn't feel right to you, then don't do it. The same should go for guys, of course--they don't all have to be comfortable with doing it themselves--but if they respect you less for your choices, especially because you're a woman, I'd pull a Liz Lemon and S that D.
Sex on a first date isn't a longevity plan though So ladies, set your goals accordingly. If someone slept with me or wanted to sleep with me on a first date I would wonder if either they sleep around quite a bit or they're only interested in the physical aspect of a relationship. I mean, I'm a guy. Come on. However, I wouldn't be able to take the girl seriously after that. I wouldn't be able to see myself staying with someone long term after that. I want a challenge, and any girl that gives it up right away doesn't present that to me.
I would also expect the same from her. I have only had a couple in my life, but there is a time and place for everything. In general, I don't feel like a woman who has frequent one night stands would ultimately be my type for a long term relationship, but I am not judging those that do. As for the question of if I would continue to see a girl I had a one night stand with It depends on what situation resulted in the said one night stand, but yes, I could feasibly continue to see her.
