I have been on dating apps for a few months now, and I keep running into the same issue. The people men, women and everyone in between whom I end up going on first dates with have all ended in friendship, which they have indicated after the first date.
I cherish those new friendships, but after all, I am looking for a partner. And sorry for the scare quotes. Someone more than a friend who will stay over after a movie to cuddle and be sexually intimate. Someone who is independent and wants to share a life with me. I do make an effort to be candid on dating apps about my interest in dating, my orientations and general upfrontness. Dating in my 30s in Athens is vastly different than it was in my 20s.
Then, dating came easily by meeting people through mutual friends. What gives? There are plenty of people our age in Athens, but they all seem to be already taken, holding steadfast to a Peter Pan lifestyle that might not appeal to those of us who want stability, or just straight-up alcoholics.
Honestly, to me, it sounds like you already know what to do: Be upfront about your intentions and orientations from the jump. I know from personal experience that there are fewer users on the latter two apps than Tinder or OkCupid, but like I said: quality, not quantity.
What training have you undergone to provide such life-changing support to the people who ask for your advice? Are you a licensed therapist? Just a dabbler in giving advice? Do you realize sometimes you are too harsh and may cause people who write you to feel shame or unkindly to themselves? I am a professional journalist and lifelong writer and raconteurβlike most advice columnists.
