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What we are seeing, experiencing in the same situation can be drastically different than what a friend, relative, or partner is. Consider trying to take a picture of the someone standing in front of sunset.
They are likely barely visible in image because the brilliant sun behind them is providing such harsh backlight. But step around your subject, with YOUR back to the sun and suddenly they are perfectly lit and you have a shot worthy of framing.
You take a radically different picture. I was reminded of the importance of frame of reference this week. I was heading back up to Tahoe for the weekend and got caught in nightmarish traffic due to accidents.
After a deep, hard, wonderful sleep, I woke up cloudy-headed and kind of desperate for coffee. My friend was working early so left me instructions on how to use her fancy espresso maker.
I read them carefully but got stuck one. I opened that cupboard and every other one in her kitchen a half dozen times and saw no grinder. I know how organized Missy is so I was certain it was somewhere but after a half hour of searching, I gave in and face-timed her at work. She walked me through it and told me to open one cupboard again.